Wild and Wonderful Adventures

The World According to a 9-Year-Old

2009-12-10T18:50:00.003-07:00

Can you imagine only knowing the 21st century? When global warming is common knowledge but Britney Spears is some random lady who shaved her head.....out of the mouth of babe :)

The decade according to 9-year-olds from allison louie-garcia on Vimeo.

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz....busy as a bee!

2009-12-10T17:17:00.003-07:00

Currently I am doing whatever I possibly can to derail myself from actually continuing to work on my 30-page "comprehensive literacy curriculum" paper. I'm on page 16 and kinda want to shoot myself. AHHH! Can it please be Sunday so this paper is in, done, and I don't have any more school until January? Pretty please?!

Yes, my last few posts of been full of frustration and I definitely don't mean to be a whiner....but i seriously don't know when my life blew up! On the bright side, I am beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel of chaos, so that is starting to cheer me up. I count approximately 10 more days until the chaos subsides. I can do it!

Part of what has been keeping me so busy (and exhausted!) lately are all of my clinics up at Winter Park. Like I've mentioned before, I'm volunteering through the NSCD as a ski instructor for developmentally and physically disabled individuals. Of course, this comes with lots of training and the past week has found me largely in a car, driving back and forth over Berthoud Pass. Of course, it would be absolutely freezing AND snowing as of late, so the usually easy 1.5 hour drive has turned into a bit more than that. I think we left yesterday morning at 6:15....as in, drove away at 6:15. I shouldn't even be awake at that hour! :) I got home around 6pm and of course, was far too exhausted to work on this god forsaken paper. I think the low yesterday with the wind chill at the base was -27 so needless to say....I've been cold every since :)

Headed up for ANOTHER clinic tomorrow morning but this one should be fun. I think we're getting to learn about all of the adaptive ski equipment and how to use it, so that is something that is definitely new for me. The other bonus is that we are actually celebrating my friend Heather's bday up in WP this weekend, so we've rented a house.....which means I don't have to drive back tomorrow night! And I get to ski for FUN on Saturday instead of another clinic! HOORAY!

Just keep swimming...

2009-12-05T12:46:00.002-07:00

I've decided this is my new mantra in life. Nemo fans everywhere have it right when they tell you to "just keep swimming." Unfortunately, I feel like I am currently drowning, but I'll keep trying.

Ugh

2009-11-30T12:20:00.003-07:00

Seriously, I am pretty ready for 2009 to be done....just get out of here cause as of late, it has not been that great. I'm not much for whining but I have to admit that I have been finding the past week or two pretty tough to get through. For those who know me, you all know that I have a surgery coming up that I am absolutely dreading. A recent death made the Thanksgiving week fairly tough and I am just glad that the year is coming to a close. If bad things happen in threes, than I think I am about good on my quota!

On a completely different subject, does anyone remember the movie Grandpa's Magical Toys? Probably not cause my sister barely remembers it, but she and I used to rent it from the public library ALL THE TIME when we were little girls. I thought of it the other day and googled it and actually found links to it on YouTube. Seriously, watch this clip.....it kinda makes me wonder what the hell we were thinking as kids! This is seriously CREEPY!!!!!!!!!!

A Time For Thanks

2009-11-24T21:56:00.002-07:00

Its Thanksgiving in two days. To me, that is crazy in itself. I cannot believe how fast time goes these days! I'm pretty sure it was summer like five seconds ago but apparently that's not the case. Anyway, Thanksgiving is always the time of year when we all become introspective and start looking at what we are thankful for. I am no different. Sure, I have a lot going on that I wish wasn't happening but I can always look on the bright side of things. For example...

1. My family and friends of course! Don't ever know what I would do without them!

2. My health. This one has been a bit shaky as of lately and there are some things going on that I would much rather avoid. But, in the end, I know it will all be okay and I could be so much worse off. I'm thankful that I have a strong enough body to do what I want to do, when I want to do it (which is a lot!), and it will conquer anything that it needs to.

3. My dog. Weird, I know, but she is my baby. When you are single and live alone, your dog becomes your companion and i wouldn't trade her for the world!

4. My ability to stay positive. Sometimes it sucks and I really don't want to, but at the end of the day, there is no benefit to being negative. Ever. I'm thankful that I am able to realize this and always look for the light at the end of the tunnel!

Hmmm......

2009-11-11T12:17:00.001-07:00

......interesting. Very, very interesting.

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

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Sean Hannity Uses Glenn Beck's Protest Footage

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Health Care Crisis

It burns, Joe!

2009-11-06T19:05:00.002-07:00

I've had a lot of people ask me about the Red Rock Fitness thing that I TRY to go to as much as possible (maybe 2-3 times per month but I'm getting better!) At any rate, I am going this weekend with my friend Cindy--who likes to hurt just as much as me!--and a few other people. I checked out the website today to see if anything had changed, and turns out they made a YouTube video for people to get an idea of what goes on in the workouts. If you're interested, check it out! And check out minute 4:40--apparently I'm famous! I have to admit, I really wish I wasn't RIGHT AFTER the woman with spectacular biceps! :)

Stupid People

2009-11-03T16:17:00.002-07:00

In the past week, I have encountered more than my fair share of REALLY STUPID PEOPLE. And mean people. Some have not been first person encounters but rather mean people doing mean things to people that I love, and in the process, scaring the hell out of me AND them. We're not going there right now. But where I am going is with the stupid people who 1) Hacked into my parent's email account last night, sending some ridiculous Sony laptop spam email to everyone in their mailbox, and 2) the different stupid person in a Pennsylvania prison who randomly connected the numbers on our company credit card and went to town on a spending spree (Well, not really...he made hundreds of dollars in long distance calls out of prison, but when he tried to buy himself a bunch of new stuff at Target and various other online retailers, he got denied....can't say Visa didn't try their best. Maybe the phrase "outgoing from prison" gave it away to the friendly telemarketer?) WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

Ok, I guess if I am being logical and rational, I can't blame the prisoner. Apparently, according to Visa, that happens all the time. After all, what else do prisoners do with the 23 hours of the day that aren't spent outside? And I can't blame him for wanting to buy stuff...that at least makes sense. But the email thing last night? It is totally in broken English and so crystal clear apparent that it is NOT from anyone in the Balogh family. Do people really think it will go unnoticed? And if that isn't their intention. . . what is? I don't get it.

And then, while I'm on a roll here.....look at this stupidity. Not the fact that he quit--I love that! But the fact that this stuff still happens is absolutely ridiculous! I'm sorry, but I wasn't aware that a Justice of the Peace had any right to determine who could and could not get married. Who the hell does this guy think he is? Totally irritates me and I'm working myself into quite a frenzy here.

I guess my bottom line of this entire tirade is that I must not understand people anywhere near as well as I thought I did. Why would you do any of this nonsense? IT MAKES NO SENSE!!!!!

Me: In a Nutshell

2009-10-26T16:45:00.002-06:00

So, I was just out walking Tally and enjoying what I imagine to be the dwindling days of fall when I looked down at my outfit and totally burst out laughing. There is nothing wrong with my clothes today, but I have to admit that they are totally representative of me in a nutshell. I have on a snowboarding beanie, complete with a fun green poof, a skiing shirt, a dance team hoodie from my undergrad days, a pair of cowboy boots, and to top it all off, a pair of Seven jeans. This eclectic hodgepodge of apparel makes me smile cause, in the end, it is totally the fashion equivalent of me!

I took a vacation to gloomy land and had an awesome time! :)

2009-10-20T23:32:00.004-06:00

Haha, so yeah! This past weekend I flew up to Portland, Oregon to visit my little sister. She lives in a city just outside of Portland while she goes to PA school. In short, the trip was awesome and it was so good to see her! I spent Friday just hanging out while she was at class. I took her dog for a run in the pouring rain cause I just figured that's what everyone does up there--otherwise, you would never leave your house! Apparently I assumed wrong cause people were looking at me like I was crazy, and a group of little kids even offered me an umbrella--while I was running! I also went to the Dollar Store and bought a ridiculous amount of Halloween decorations and went to town on her house. When Missy and her roommate came home, I like to think they were giddy with joy at the sight of the inflatable skeletons, wall-hanging witches, and orange and black ballooons! :)

Saturday was spent at a pumpkin farm that apparently is owned by the people from the TLC show, Little People Big World. Of course, I have no idea what this show is and I've been told about a thousand times that this is unacceptable. At any rate, the mom from the show was there and we got a picture with her. How adorable! We spent that night out in downtown Portland for one of Missy's friend's going away party, and had a blast. We went to dinner at the Portland City Grill which is the beautiful restaurant on the 30th floor that overlooks the entire city. Found some cool bars, and I managed to consume half of a VooDoo doughnut as well, so I can knock that off my life list! Making plans to head back this winter for some ski trips at Mt. Hood or Bachelor!

This is seriously messed up!

2009-10-13T17:10:00.002-06:00

So, a few of my friend posted a link to this story on facebook today. That is seriously messed up! What is wrong with this guy? He is taking his "art" to an entirely new level that is not artistic....it almost sounds like some sick way to get attention....or something. I don't know. He talks about doing the same project only with punching people in the face and that one kinda made me laugh....even though it is equally stupid. I'm not even really sure how to react to this, but as Megan said, "It totally disgusts me."

Busy busy busy!

2009-10-08T17:45:00.004-06:00

It was brought to my attention the other day that I haven't really "written" anything on here in awhile...and its true. Lots of quick posts and links and videos that I find amusing, but nothing substantial....and apparently my (few) friends who stalk me on here would like an update! So here goes....

Life is busy!! I guess it always is but the past few months have literally been ridiculous. I can't imagine adding one more component or else I could explode! Luckily things are winding down now so it gives me time to relax. And what have I been busy with? August was nuts--we had all of Angel's wedding-related parties plus the Tri for the Cure and the Steamboat Tri (which ended up not happening for me but I digress....), a few trips to the doctor for various aches and ailments followed by a subsequent few weeks spent in a foot brace and on the couch with strict orders not to run. For me, the no running thing was brutal. For my dog, it was even worse. Luckily we both made it through that okay! :)

September rolled around and was jumpstarted by a billion trips to the bridal store for multiple alterations on my bridesmaid dress. Of course, I also decided the beginning of the month was a perfect time to move into a new apartment which I am still trying to organize. Maybe my timing was off on that one....hmmm. I then zoomed off to Mexico for Angel and Adrian's wedding and it was awesome. I posted a few pictures awhile back but they definitely don't do it justice. The resort was amazing and we had beautiful weather. Angel looked gorgeous and was definitely one of the most beautiful brides I have ever seen. Being an all-inclusive, lots of drinking ensued, followed by general merriment. And of course, since I was with the Montgomery (and Drelles!) family, the name of the game quickly became "which family member can we set Heather up with." They all really enjoyed that because (as Karen explained for me), "Heather, we want you to be a real part of our family!" :)Definitely an awesome wedding!!

Aside from all of that, work is the usual crazy, and I have actually been helping a friend get into shape so she can compete in her first-ever triathlon with me next summer. She has never participated in anything like that, but I was telling her about the Tri for the Cure so she set a goal for herself. She says she wants me to be her "mini-Jillian", and sans the puking of course, I think I am doing a pretty good job! I have actually been trying to whip myself back into some semblance of shape again as well. After I took those few weeks off from running, I kinda felt like I atrophied or something! Seriously! I've started going back to RRF on Saturdays at Red Rocks, as well as getting some runs and weights in. I'd like to get back into spinning classes as well, but we'll see....after all, I don't want to get over zealous since SKI SEASON IS HERE!!

Yes, that's right...hooray! I am so pumped for ski season! I saw the new Matchstick film on opening night and it was awesome and got me totally pumped. Got a new jacket and pants this season as well as some bindings on my park skis so I am rearing to go! I have my orientation up at Winter Park in a few weekends and I am very excited for that. Since I don't work in the winters, I volunteered to be a ski instructor for mental health patients every Friday. It works well for my M.Ed degree, but I also think it will be really enjoyable. And even better.....drumroll please......is the 2nd Annual Hut Trip!!! We booked an entire hut this year so we don't have to share with random people, so 16 of us will be trekking our way into the wilderness at the end of January. Very psyched for this cause last year's was awesome. Obviously, this is a very different group of people than went last year but we still have some returners (Me, Angel, Price, Bennett!) as well as lots of "new kids." Angel and I taking bets on which one of them will cry first when they realize what a bitch it is to get into those damn huts! :)

Ummm.....I guess that sums up my busy life in a teeny-tiny nutshell. With the new semester starting in a week and a trip to Oregon to visit my sister next weekend, I am sure I will have more "real stuff" to share soon!

Happy Halloween!!

2009-10-06T17:51:00.000-06:00

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

All the Single Ladies...

2009-10-02T09:48:00.003-06:00

So, my little sister flew out this past weekend for Angel's wedding reception and it was so good to see her. I miss her and wish she could have stayed! At any rate, it was also a good reminder of how flipping hysterically funny she can be! She posted this video on her facebook page last night and I pretty much fell out of my chair this morning laughing. First of all, why is this woman wearing a clown mask? That is perhaps the strangest part ever. Second of all, why is she filming herself in said clown mask? And third, the smacking of the head...I don't even know what to say about that! Maybe it's just Balogh humor....but I think its funny!!

Begging for a Good Cause

2009-10-01T10:22:00.003-06:00

One of my childhood friends, Dan Carr, is now Peace Corps volunteer in Malawi and he is doing wonderful things for the people in his village and surrounding areas. He is currently trying to enact a Wildlife and Environment Extravaganza that takes students to a 5-day camp to teach them about ways to conserve the local environment. However, he needs money and the project cannot start until he receives $1200. Sooooooo....I decided that I was going to help in his effort by getting the word out! Go the Peace Corps website and type in his last name (Carr)in the search box. His project is the "Environment Camp 2009" project. Take a look at what he is doing and help him if you can!!

Thoughts to Live By

2009-10-01T10:14:00.002-06:00

I got this in an email from my Mom....
************************************************************************************

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things: a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.

I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as making a 'life..'

I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both
hands. You need to be able to throw something back sometimes.

I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude you. But, if you focus on your family, your friends, the needs of others, your work and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you.

I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.

I've learned that even when I havepains, I don't have to be one.

I've learned that every day, you should reach out and touch someone.

People love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back..

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn.

Celebrity Collage by MyHeritage

2009-09-22T06:11:00.002-06:00

Near as I can tell, I don't look like any of these women!

MyHeritage: Celebrity Collage - Free family tree search - Family search

Dance dance revolution

2009-09-18T12:34:00.002-06:00

So, I began dancing when I was a very little girl, and although I don't do it a whole lot anymore, my 20+ years of dance experience drew me to this. Gotta show dancers some love! :)

Angel and Adrian's Wedding

2009-09-15T20:27:00.004-06:00

Just a few pictures....

Up on a soapbox

2009-08-31T12:49:00.004-06:00

I'm on a soapbox. But that's ok cause its my blog and I'm allowed to be! Obviously, there is a lot of chaos lately about Obama and his healthcare reform plan. And clearly, people are totally up-in-arms on both sides. Coming from the side of someone who works full time and goes to grad school fulltime but still cannot afford insurance and has definitely needed it in the past, you can imagine which side I am on. But rather than go into that aspect of it, there are two other things that I think are far more effective in their message than I could ever be. First of all, read this article. Yes, I am biased because the Abby in the article is my roommate from freshman year in college and her situation obviously hits very close to home for me. I know how hard she has worked since college and to deal with the situation that she currently has is complete bullshit. So read the article!

And when you are done reading the article, watch this video.....cause its good :)

Add this one to the list...

2009-08-26T18:07:00.001-06:00

Apparently all the good films are being released in September this year! MSP's new film is shown at the Boulder Theater on September 19, and the Reel Rock Tour is coming the week before on September 10. Of course, thats the night before I leave for Mexico, but I don't care...I wanna see this!

Mt. Evans Part Deux

2009-08-24T17:13:00.002-06:00

This weekend was Angel's bachelorette party. And although it was completely awesome and we had a great time, I don't really want to write about that. I'd rather write about my new plan: Mt. Evans.

For those of you who don't know, Mt. Evans is a 14er (mountain above 14,000 feet) here in Colorado that also boasts the highest road in the United States. Yes, there is a paved road to the top. Evans is attached via the Sawtooth Ridge to Mt. Bierstadt, another one of Colorado's 14ers. I have done Bierstadt a few times, and hiked the two peaks together via the ridge about 5 years ago. They are both great mountains and pretty simple--really good for beginners who are trying to get into the 14er game. (Although, hiking Evans kinda sucks when you get to the top and see the parking lot. Pikes Peak is the same...but I digress). At any rate, we were enjoying the last hours of Angel's bachelorette weekend yesterday when Cindy made the unassuming comment of, "Hey, we should totally cycle Mt. Evans." Whether she really meant it or not is debatable, but I am now totally hooked. I want to cycle the mountain.

I figure that I have already hiked it, so for those 14er purists out there, I have technically "bagged" the peak. But I have to admit that I am curious: would cycling the mountain be any more difficult than hiking? Or would it be easier? I haven't done a lot of hill climbing on my bike this summer, but I bet I could do it. I also wonder how it would compare to the Appalachians? I understand the elevation could be a factor, and it might be more steep than some of the passes I cycled on the East Coast during my trip...but I also won't be cycling a panier full of tent, sleeping bag, clothes, etc.

In short, I wanna do it. Labor Day Weekend. It's go time!! :)

Thoughts of the Day (It will definitely make you laugh)

2009-08-18T14:04:00.001-06:00

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves me.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

That's enough, Nickelback.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.

Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?

Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

There is a great need for sarcasm font.

Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the fuck was going on when I first saw it.

I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

The other night I hit a new low at an open bar. I had already hopped on highway blackout when, inevitably I had to find a bathroom. Eventually I decided it was probably on the other side of the bar so I tried to walk over there, but ran into a guy coming the other way. We played that, Both go left, Both go right game to no avail, so I finally put out my hand to guide myself past and that’s is when I realized, yup, that’s a mirror I just tried to walk through. And the guy on the other side is me. Even cats can re cognize their own image.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.

A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.

Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when a n entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories

Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA. No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don’t win, they are executed.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

I think that if, years down the road when I’m trying to have a kid, I find out that I’m sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.

Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I’d bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimate d that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There’s nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.

I Heart Live

2009-08-16T21:51:00.003-06:00

I watched the movie Zack and Miri Make a Porno tonight....weird. Sometimes I think Seth Rogen is wicked funny, other times I find him super obnoxious. Either way, I actually liked this movie. When you got past all of the swearing and sex and Seth Rogen stuff, it was really just a chick flick with a love story!

But that is not my point. My point is that there is this song in the movie that I love! Its by Live, one of my all-time fave bands (I think that goes back to the Throwing Copper days, but anyway....) and is called Hold Me Up. I guess it was supposed to be released on Throwing Copper but it never was, and Kevin Smith has tried to use it in a bunch of his movies ever since. He finally used it in Zack and Miri and now I love it! :)

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-08-15T15:06:00.000-06:00

Can't wait to see this!!!!!!